We’re knee deep in apocalypses here.
All of a sudden, earlier this week, the smoke from nearby wildfires blew into town. It got dark with a strong tint of what I can only assume is the color of the apocalypse and a nasty smell that I can only assume is the scent of the apocalypse. It started raining ash, and gusts of wind started blowing shit around.
The sun is a not-so-bright red circle in the sky that you can look directly at, contrary to the advice of Bruce Springsteen’s mother.
And we’re not supposed to go outside because the air is “hazardous.” If you want to go outside, you need an N95 mask - you know, the masks we’re not supposed to have because we should be saving them for the health care workers? Cuz Covid? Remember?
Actually, there are two kinds of N95 masks, and the one that’s used for hanging out in hazardous environments isn’t the same as the one used by medical workers during a pandemic. The hazardous-environment one has a vent, so it keeps the hazards from coming in but also lets all of your Coronavirus out. So maybe it’s ok if we have those. I don’t know.
Hot, dry winds out of the east were blowing smoke from wildfires right into our valley. As my friend in Portland said, “It went from beautiful calm blue skies to Mad Max here.“ And it only took a few minutes.
Nearby towns evacuated before their houses started burning. Parts of Springfield have an evacuation warning. We packed bags and got the RV ready, just in case.
Now, if you’re a devoted reader, you already know:
I have a fractured bone in my leg and I’m in a walking boot.
Our water heater is broken (we’re limping along with some hot water some of the time).
Our washing machine is broken.
What you may not know is that one of our cats just died. He was a great cat and he’s been with us since our son was a baby. Losing a pet isn’t fun, and we certainly don’t have a lot left in the tank these days, what with all the apocali and all.
And hey, does anyone remember that we’re in the middle of a pandemic? Things are so weird now that I’m thinking back fondly on the days when our biggest problem was a virus that’s tearing our world apart. Well, that’s dropped pretty far down on the list all of a sudden.
All things considered, we have it pretty good. Lots of people lost their homes, businesses, pets, and all their stuff. Some of them have places to go, if they have friends or family outside the evacuation areas that are letting people inside their house during Covid. The rest are going to evacuation centers. In Springfield, they were sending people to Thurston High School. But because of the Virus, they weren’t letting them inside. So they can’t go home, they can’t go inside the school, and they’re not supposed to be outside, because of the hazardous air. So they’re living “in or near” their cars in the high school parking lot. Which, as you probably figured out, is outside. In the hazardous air. I guess you have to rank your apocala in order of apocalypticness, and air that burns your eyes and smells terrible and has dangerous particulate is the most preferable of the available options.
So we have it pretty good. We’re packing bags full of dirty clothes (cuz our washing machine is broken), stocking the RV with stuff (cuz if we have to leave, at least we have a small house on wheels), and prepping the still-living pets for a quick exit.
And of course, I’m still working, because the rest of the world just keeps on going. Some of them are having just one apocalypse right now.
As another friend said, “Not a lot of squares left on the 2020 bingo card.”
(It’s probably apocalypses.)